I am selfish, I am brave
by skippysky
Summary: Tris gets to choose whether she wants to be trained as a selfless person in Abnegation or be a hero in Dauntless. yes she is in high school but this is my first fanfiction so i thought i start with something easy. please read and enjoy!
1. Chapter 1

TRIS

"Choose, ether the knife or the cheese."

Gosh this is tough. And why do we need to choose between a knife and cheese anyways? How will that help decide whether were brave, or selfless, or kind, or honest, or smart?

This isn't making sense is it?

Better start at the beginning.

I wake up at 5:30 this morning. Man I still have an hour till I have to get up, so I decide to snooze till 6:30, but no matter how hard I tried I couldn't find any part of me that still wanted a nap so I decide to give an early welcome to that thing in the sky called the sun.

As I get my clothes on (I took a shower last night so I wouldn't have to wake up early, though I guess it makes little difference now), I get a sudden rush of panic. Today is the day when I'm going to get to take my aptitude test, which is basically a test to tell you what people you should hang out with.

Let me explain this more. When we first entered middle school are parents were given the choice of whether to put us though regular school or this special program that is supposed to help prevent bullying in young students. Well my parents went through this program and liked it a lot so they decided to sign us up for it (me and my brother that is). But here's the catch. Your parents get to choose which hall or "faction" you get put into, you must stay in that faction in till you reach the age of 16 and you choose to go into regular school or take the aptitude test and ether switch halls or stay in that one, oh and this is a boarding school so unless you are like me which your parents work in the hall way your assigned to you only get to see your parents on visiting day or, if your 16, you choose regular school.

Yeah so you can see why I would be nervous for today right. Well as I said my parents work in the same hallway they picked so we talked about it as a family and after very brief deliberation decided me and Caleb would continue with the program and take the aptitude test.

Well today is the day that I take that test and I'm really nervous.

As I head down stairs to get some breakfasts from the communal kitchen I see my mother sitting at the counter sipping a small glass of water. She is wearing the same gray and loose uniform as everyone else wears here and she looks thoughtful as I approach her.

"Good morning mother," I say as I take a seat beside her.

"Good morning Beatrice" she says back to me.

We sit in a uncomfortable silence as she sips her water and I try to get my hair into the weird bun that every girl in Abnegation has. I have tried for many years to get my hair to do this but a part of my hair always slips out one way or another.

As I try again to get a part of my bangs into the bun I feel two hands come from behind and tied the bun into a perfect knot at the back of my head. With a jolt I realize that my mother has gotten up to help me.

"There now your hair won't slip out." She says as she slides the last bobby pin in place.

I take this opportunity to ask her a question that has been on my mind for a while.

"Where you nervous for your aptitude test," I ask her tensely. I'm afraid that she will say something like how easy it is or how I have nothing to worry about. I hold my breath as I wait for her answer.

"No I wasn't nervous," she replies calmly. My spirits sink but then she finished her sentence. "I was terrified."

"Why?" I ask even though I know curiosity is self-indulgent.

"I was afraid it tell me something I didn't want to hear." She says coolly. "Now come on it's your turn to prepare breakfast." She walks towards the stove but I stare out the window. What if that happens to me? What if it tells me something I don't want to hear? This test has been known to tear more than one family apart.

"Come Beatrice." My mother calls, "the eggs will burn for sure if you don't flip them soon."

Before I turn around to flip the eggs I see the sun shine it's light for the first time today.

'Well good morning mister sun shine' I say in my mind before I get to work.

*****PAGE BREAK*****

I wait in line with all the other kids in Abnegation hall to take the aptitude test. Just in case you're wondering everyone takes the test but at the "choosing ceremony" is when you pick whether you're going to regular school or are continuing with the program.

5 more kids enter the testing room and Caleb is the last of them. Before he enters he gives me an encouraging smile and heads on in.

After about twenty minuets they call 5 more kids up to the testing rooms.

I'm the first of the five so I won't be having the same test administrator as Caleb.

With a nervous snap of my fingers I walk on in.

The room is white with two leather chairs in it. At first that's all I notice but then I see a woman at a table in the corner of the room.

"Hello my name is Tori and I will be your test administrator for today. Please take a seat." She says all this in a bored voice and as I head towards the chairs I see she is holding some blue liquid in it.

When I get settled into the chair she hands the liquid to me.

"What is this?" I ask more out of curiosity then out of concern.

"Truth serum." She says briskly. "It will help us decide if your choices are true or not." She pauses. "So bottoms up!"

With that I quickly down the contents in the glass.

A foggy feeling takes over me. I can't really focus on anything and I feel the over welling urge to spill my guts.

"To test to see if it is working I will ask you a few test questions first then the real thing will begin." Tori states "what is your real name?"

"Beatrice Prior." I say

"Age?"

"16"

"Current faction?"

"Abnegation."

"OK, good now for the real thing"

"Choose, ether the knife or the cheese."

What why is this relevant. So as true to nature of the truth serum I say the question on my mind.

"Why?"

Instead of answering my question she asked hers again.

"choose, ether the knife or the cheese"

"why?"

"choose, ether the knife or the cheese"

Well if she won't answer my question I won't answer hers.

"No."

She deliberates this for a while then she marks something on her paper.

"OK," she says. "have it your way. An attack dog is coming at you. You have thirty seconds to decide what to do starting now."

OK so an attack dog is coming at me but what do I do? Because of my stubbornness I now have nothing. OK Beatrice just think dogs take there orgine from wolfs and they travel in packs. So they must have a leader. And that leader…. Never likes being looked in the eyes.

"You have 15 seconds left."

"I go on my hands and knees and don't look it to the eyes."

She gives me a considering look and marks something on her paper.

"The dog is now tame but a little girl comes and the dog tries to attack her. What do you do."

I don't even need to consider. "I tackle the dog to the ground."

She marks another thing on her paper.

"Last one. A man approaches you and asks you what person you if you have family at your house. This man looks violent and unstable. You in fact do have family at your house. Do you tell him the truth or do you lie and say no?

I consider the situation. Well this man looks unstable so he might have something bad intended for my family. Well family first.

"Choose to lie," I say.

She marks something on her paper and then she tells me my results.

"your most compatible factions are Abnegation, Dauntless, and Erudite."

With that she ushers me out of the room as if everything was perfect. But everything was anything but.


	2. Chapter 2

Tris

I sit in my bed in the girl's dormitory. Pondering what my resalts were, Erudite, Abnegation, and Dauntless. I will never ever join Erudite, for a faction that vaulees knolege over everything else they sure do tell lots of untrue facts. I don't know if I can stay in Abnegation though I just… don't fit in here. I've tried so hard but I'm just not selfless enough. And all that leaves is Dauntless. There very free and wild and crazy, and I like that about them I really do, it's just that dauntless kids train to be heros and, well, I don't know if I can be that. I don't even know the first thing about changing a tire much less safe a child from a wreck.

As I think about all of this theres a knock at my door.

My mother enters. "Beatrice, it time to head to the ceremony." She gives me a smile and leads me out of the room.

We walk out of the room quietly so we don't wake thoughs that are not going.

We walk to central hall were everyone waits patiently to get to the auditorium. With the last check of a couple late kids we start on are way.

I'm so nervous that my hands start to get sweaty, even though it is perfectly cool in the hall way despite all the other kids. I wipe my hand on the sides of my dress earning me a couple of pointed stairs form kids and faculty members that think I'm down smoothing my dress (which is consider self-indulgent).

I immediately put me hands together. Well Abnegation just lost themselves some brownie points.

As we enter the auditorium I feel something bump into my shoulder. I turn to see that it is my brother Caleb. He leans down and whisper in my ear.

"What ever happens today Beatrice just remember about mom and dad." He straightens and looks at me.

I give him a confused look and node my head. Why wouldn't I think about mom and dad? I mean they're a big part of why I am still even considering Abnegation as a potential faction.

With that he nodes his head too and we fall into line.

The organization is first letter of our last name and then first letter of are first name. They also call off names from Z to A (makes no sense right) so Caleb will be going before me.

The First kid gets called up and picks Amity, but after that I don't know who gets called up and who picks what. As you can probably tell I'm pretty much past nervous and have shot up to terrified.

Then before I know it Caleb is being called up and has his marble in hand(it's what we use to indicate are choice and how many kids chose what faction). He gives one last glace at me smiles grimly and walks up to the Erudite bowl and drops his marble in it.

I'm shocked. Why didn't he choose Abnegation like he practically told me to?

But then I remember the look he gave me after what he said about mom and dad earlier. The look he had on his face. He knew that I would be going after him. He knew one of us would have to stay in Abnegation, for are parents sake. I knew what he was telling me now. He was telling to choose Abnegation because he would not do it, his heart won't let him.

My name is called and I grab my marble. I know what I must do. I walk up the aisle towards the stage. As I grasps what I must do my heart does a stomach twisting flip. Then my brain comes up with reasons why I must pick differently. Why must I do this? Why is Caleb being a coward a putting me, his younger sister, up to something I don't want to do? Didn't he think that maybe I didn't want to lead an average life? No he only thought about what he wanted, that's why he left. But why must we do every so selflessly? Can't we have some selfish need satisfied? I want to pick something else but my parents… I will not see them intill the next vistiting day, if they even decide to come at all.

Wait Tris think…. Caleb is very close to you he would know how you think. So he would that by using this method he would be able to get me to choose Abnegation while he go and chase his selfish dream. No I will not do that I will not give in to his Erudite way of thinking. So when I get up to the plat form I walk up to the Dauntless and Abnegation bowls.

I must choose no am I a selfish but brave person, or am I a selfless and fearful person?

I hold my hand out. I have made my choice. My hand falls open and the marble falls into the Dauntless bowl.

I am selfish, I am brave.


End file.
